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Laundry 101: Passive Aggressive Training written by Shannon Colussi

Posted By Rebecca Eckler on February 15, 2011

Tagged: Rant, Rave, Shannon Colussi

This is the story of how a grown man learned to place his clothes in a laundry basket.  Beware it is not for the faint of heart.  There is swearing and nudity – full frontal nudity.

Our story begins when our bachelor and our heroine met and began dating; both had been married before and came to the table fairly jaded.  After many months, our heroine finally agreed to move in with the bachelor and he was very happy.  Our heroine however, quickly got sick of the “carpet” of dirty socks and underwear in the bedroom.

Finally it came to her…..

On her way home from work one day she stopped at the dollar store and bought a dozen, yes, 12 laundry baskets: one green one and eleven white ones.  Clandestine and devious, I know. Stay with me here.

She placed the one green basket on her side of the closet and one white basket on his side of the closet.  Each day she placed her dirty clothes in the green basket.

Each day as the bachelor dropped his dirty clothes on the floor, our heroine quietly picked up the clothes put down a laundry basket and placed the clothes in the basket.  Two days later there were now two laundry baskets on the floor of their bedroom.  Seven days later there were seven baskets and ten days later….you guessed it, ten laundry baskets.  Now the tenth day fell on a Friday which is also the day the bachelor and the heroine liked to go out to the bar and go dancing and have a few drinks, get tipsy and take a cab home.

It was this fateful night…the tenth night, when our bachelor (who was sleeping in the nude) got up at 3am to go to the washroom (and was still a little tipsy) and he tripped over one of the laundry baskets on the floor and hopped, jumped, twisted, turned and then fell to the floor, sprawled out buck naked on top of ten laundry baskets.  On the way down there was a yelp and an expletive that rhymes with truck.  Once he was down, there was a full expletive laden verbal tirade regarding the purpose and placement of said laundry baskets.

Our heroine waited patiently, with the faint curl of a smile hidden by the darkness and then said, “Well if you would pick one, I would know which one to keep.”  Touche my beauty, touché!

- – - – - – - – -

Shannon is a wife, mother, daughter, sister and friend.  She has 3 kids (7, 4, and 1) and works part-time from home.  Somehow, in the wee hours of the morning or between dance classes, beavers and doctors appointments she still finds time to do some freelance writing. Her blog is called Pushing the Buggy, is where she talks about motherhood, having a child with Cerebral Palsy and trying to deal with her everyday life.  If you have something to ask her you can reach her at shannoncolussi@yahoo.ca and also follow her on twitter @pushingthebuggy.

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